seeing extinguished flames

what are your thoughts on that? does the chemistry really ever go away entirely? i don’t know, to be honest. 

is it okay to hang out with them after everything is said and done and our heart’s healed? 

i guess it depends on the kind of person you and your once fling are, and the setting. it’s not something i’ve had to deal with all too often as until now i’ve mostly dated guys who live, at the very least, an hour’s commute from where I live so it’s easy to just disconnect entirely and not consider expending the effort to go see them. i don’t know, there’s this guy that i saw yesterday. at one point in knowing each other we exchanged “i love you”s and kisses and nights spent in cuddled real close, but that was many moons ago and i’ve kind of just learned to accept that whole phase as a sweet time that eventually led to me hating him on and off for a very long time, so therefore a time I would not repeat. long story short, yesterday we spent the day together as friends and laughed and had a ball doing really simple things like getting ice cream and walking along piers. there’s a certain comfort that exists when talking to him (well, on the good days - moody son of a gun, let me tell you) that i really appreciate, so it was good to shoot the breeze with a kind soul and simultaneously make fun of him to no end. light on the other end of the tunnel of all that love business is i can now freely joke about all his bad qualities with him and it’s fine! i’m a fan of that. in fact, i’m a hundred times more comfortable around him now than when we were actually seeing each other! i used to barely be able to look him in the eye, let alone contest much of what he said - and now quite the opposite! that’s probably me just growing out of my doormat phase, though. c’est la vie, haha. there was a glimmer in our eyes and a warmth in our interactions that i haven’t seen or felt around him for ages, but i’m kind of just going to let that be and take it as a nice day and resume everyday life. as should you, if you find yourself in such a situation. nine times out of ten if you let it go much farther than that, you’re asking for a whole lot of messy. and let me tell you, cleaning up is no small task.

Love,

Elle

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